I Miss You, And I Never Even Had You; Guy's Version
I lay on my bed thinking of you now. I lay still in my bed, trying not to fall asleep, crossing the barrier from “awake” to “dreaming” . I listened to sad, heartbreaking music, all about missing someone, someone that get away, someone they had once loved. " What is the word for missing someone, for knowing there is something missing from you because they are not there, when you have never had them to begin with? Does that word exist?" I touched your hand, trying to hold it. I don’t think you know I did, but I felt it. It’s little things like this that I miss, the tiny bits that make up a whole imagined life, something we could have had, if we were two different people. Sometimes I stare at you, and I wonder what you are thinking. You have these soft, kind loving eyes, and sometimes I imagine that they are only this way with me, but I know that can’t be true. I am sure that you look at me just like you look at everyone else; captivating, smart, but ultimately uninterested